Wow, I watched 500 films in 2015. My original goal was 365 - a movie each day. I mostly succeeded but during some of my vacations I was unable to watch much and there were lapses but I always made up for it by watching multiple films in one day. Anyway, I'm not striving for 500 in 2016, but I will continue to watch and review as many films as my life allows. 365 is the goal again, and it's reasonable, but I did feel like a slave to my goal at times despite it being for my own enjoyment. This year, I will watch as much as I can but not be as adamant as I was in 2015. Let's go!
#1 - Home Alone 2: Lost In New York [1992]
While not as good as the first, it ups the ante in so many ways, including the insanely complicated deathtraps and the runtime. Still it really works and is about as fun as the first one, just in a larger and more diverse setting.
Rating: 8.5/10
#2 - Ricki & The Flash [2015]
Meh. A good soundtrack and cast are wasted on a boilerplate script and boring direction from Jonathan Demme, surprisingly.
Rating: 5.5/10
#3 - Nightcrawler [2014]
A strange and disquieting film that Jake Gyllenhaal should have won an Oscar for. It really tears into sensationalistic journalism and the seedy side of people and their duplicitous intentions. Love it.
Rating: 9/10
#4 - Billy Madison [1995]
Arguably Adam Sandler's best early film. So quotable! "O'Doyle rules!", "THANK YOU miss Lippy!!!", "Donkey Kong sucks. Y'know something YOU SUCK!", and of course "If peeing your pants is cool, call me Miles Davis!"
Rating: 8/10
#5 - Deep Rising [1998]
One of my all time favorite guilty pleasures. It has a ridiculously complicated and over-the-top premise that it wholeheartedly develops until the thrilling finale. It's a crowd-pleasing movie. The bad guys are made out to be assholes you don't care if they die, treat Williams is badass, Famke Jansen is sexy as hell especially in that red dress with her titties popping out and Michael J O'Connor is funny as hell despite his screeching voice. The monster is one of the coolest see monsters of ever seen, and the shenanigans get gory as hell. People are ripped apart, melted, eaten alive and assimilated in bloody detail with some impressively grew some special effects. The practical stunts and explosions are incredible, and the Jet Ski monster chase in the finales one of the coolest things I've ever seen put on film. I also love the visuals and the lively score. This one has its tongue firmly in cheek, but every second of it is a fucking blast! I cannot recommend this film enough, check it out!
Rating: 9/10
#6 - The Guardian [2006]
A competent retelling of Top Gun in the Coast Guard setting. It is fairly predictable but exciting and enjoyable. Costner is gruff but it works and Kutcher isn't as annoying as you'd expect. The rescue scenes are tense thanks to Andrew Davis' steady direction.
Rating: 7/10
#7 - The Spy Who Loved Me [1977]
One of my favorite James Bond adventures thanks to the underwater setting and some of the series best gadgets. The opening is cool especially Bond deploying a British flag is his parachute before the titles roll. Curt Jergens makes for an awesome and memorable villain. The opening track "Nobody Does It Better" is decent but nothing remarkable. Slow and typical.
Rating: 8.5/10
#8 - Bad Boys II [2003]
Better than the first, everything is bigger, louder and more AWESOME. The banter and chemistry between Smith and Lawrence is hilarious and offensive. They play off each other so well. The action is bone-jarring and slick as always, with a freeway chase involving multiple muscle cars and a car carrier that drops its cars onto a 70 mph highway in an attempt to lose our heroes.
Rating: 7/10
#9 - Resident Evil [2002]
My first Paul WS Anderson movie and adaptation of the popular video game franchise, which I actually hadn't played but was very familiar with. Since played titles one through three and a couple of offshoots like code Veronica X I think? There were giant tarantulas in a sewer or water canal. AnyWho this adaptation is quite different, but it works as a nifty sci-fi movie with a number of nods to zombie films of the past. The most surprising thing is the lack of Gore. Being rated R and being a zombie movie, this came out before zombie movies really came back into the mainstream with the Dawn of the dead remake and things like the walking dead and left for dead. The zombie craze reached its zenith and is finally becoming stale. The characters are stereotypical but fun and the while the film doesn't bear much resemblance to the video game, it is fun.
Rating: 7.5/10
#9 - Blade: Trinity [2004]
I hate this movie. Having just recently watched the first film, I can honestly say I love the first two Blade films probably more then a grown man should but they are a fucking blast! This one, much like Terminator Genisys, begins promisingly but quickly shits the bed after the opening action scene. It's a violent car chase that's fun and shows off some of Blade new weapons like the chain-knife but it still can't come close to the opening of Part II. There are many problems here but the main offenders are the godawful script, piss poor direction by Goyer, horrible acting (Biel, Triple H but most of all Parker fucking Posey who's only ever been good in Dazed And Confused), shitty CGI and ugly visuals/cinematography.
Rating: 3/10
#10 - Vampires [1998]
Carpenter's last great film. (As I am watching this, my wife came down and said "oh this is a great movie " I guess that settles it haha) The vampires are actually scary because of their savage brutality and sheer power. They feel menacing, something that was lost once True Blood became so popular and vampires became pussified. Things begin quickly and violently Jack Crow and his crew of hunters clearing out a vampire nest in impressively bloody fashion using creative vampire killing weapons & technology like the Blade films. They use a tethered crossbow to snare vampires and then drag them out into the sunlight using a tow wench and cable attached to the crossbow bolt. It's so cool and creative, but realistically possible. The gore is chunky and unflinching, especially his dismembering of his deceased team members (capped off by an awesome 'cool dude walking away from explosion' shot). Love the dude getting sliced his torso severed diagonally. As is Carpenter's style, everything is accomplished with kickass practical effects.
The film has a distinct western feel with earthy cinematography and an utterly badass James Woods as the cowboy facing off against the vampire hoards. Seriously, James Woods is fucking fantastic here. He's vicious, intelligent, lewd, brutally honest and endlessly quotable, so much so that Roger Ebert declared his performance Oscar-worthy. I also dig the religious overtones, like Valek on the ceiling in a Jesus Christ pose and of course the central plot points of the Black Cross and Crow's vampire hunters being Vatican sanctioned/funded.
The film has a distinct western feel with earthy cinematography and an utterly badass James Woods as the cowboy facing off against the vampire hoards. Seriously, James Woods is fucking fantastic here. He's vicious, intelligent, lewd, brutally honest and endlessly quotable, so much so that Roger Ebert declared his performance Oscar-worthy. I also dig the religious overtones, like Valek on the ceiling in a Jesus Christ pose and of course the central plot points of the Black Cross and Crow's vampire hunters being Vatican sanctioned/funded.
Rating: 8.5/10
#11 - Solomon Kane [2012]
I disregarded this movie multiple times on Netflix, but caught it after John Carpenter's vampires. Beginning was awesome with a dark fantasy vibe and enough violence, cool visuals and badassery to satisfy me. The Devil's Watcher or whatever was imposing and terrifying. I loved the guttural voice. I had no idea Pete Postlewaithe and Christopher Plummer were in this.
Rating: ?/10
#12 - Sicario [2015]
Intense and frightening with superb performances. Emily Blunt is intelligent and vulnerable, keeping her character from falling back on genre clichés. Josh Brolin and Benicio Del Toro both deliver subtly sinister performances that rival their best work. Precise and methodical direction from Denis Villeneuve with lots of slow pans. He has a steady hand and keen eye for beautiful yet gloomy shots, including gorgeous ones of the landscape much like The Revenant.
This is the slowburn movie as it takes its time but it holds your complete attention, a rare feat for a film in 2015. It paints the world as increasingly corrupt and scary with nowhere to run, not even our own homes. It calls for more direct action, regardless of morals or political correctness. This is war and all bets are off. Josh Brolin’s character sums it up perfectly when he’s accused of using questionable tactics: "the boundary has been moved". The action is taut and suspenseful, punctuated by raw and realistic violence that evokes shades of Heat with their authenticity. I found myself holding my breath a few times, finally letting out a sigh of relief (or shock) once certain scenes concluded.
Much like Villeneuve’s previous film Prisoners, this is a bleak but necessary look at the current state of the world and its clashing viewpoints.
This is the slowburn movie as it takes its time but it holds your complete attention, a rare feat for a film in 2015. It paints the world as increasingly corrupt and scary with nowhere to run, not even our own homes. It calls for more direct action, regardless of morals or political correctness. This is war and all bets are off. Josh Brolin’s character sums it up perfectly when he’s accused of using questionable tactics: "the boundary has been moved". The action is taut and suspenseful, punctuated by raw and realistic violence that evokes shades of Heat with their authenticity. I found myself holding my breath a few times, finally letting out a sigh of relief (or shock) once certain scenes concluded.
Much like Villeneuve’s previous film Prisoners, this is a bleak but necessary look at the current state of the world and its clashing viewpoints.
Rating: 9.5/10
#13 - Talledega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby [2005]
Not as good or consistent as Anchorman, but its more satirical elements and encompassing scope make it quite fun. It's more enjoyable if you're a NASCAR fan, but you don't need to be to still have a hearty chuckle.
Rating: 6.5/10
#14 - Creed [2015]
Inspiring and emotional.
Rating: 8.5/10
#15 - Rocky IV [1985]
Just got back from seeing Creed and look what's on when I got home! Rocky IV is flashy and gloriously excessive (Paulie's birthday robot?) but it has heart, making it one of the series' best despite its over-the-top style. It also has the best soundtrack, a collection of upbeat motivational 80's one hit wonders including "Heart's On Fire" and the iconic "No Easy Way Out" in addition to Vince DeCola's "War". Drago is one of Rocky's most fearsome opponents, played robotically by the sweaty Swede, Dolph Lundgren. While the Cold War overtones and message of peace comes off as a little hokey and heavy-handed, it's not that bad and the world today could use someone like Rocky Balboa to fight terrorists...I smell an idea for Rocky VII (VIII?)!
Rating: 8.5/10
#16 - Jurassic Park III [2001]
Joe Johnston's crack at a third JP flick has only gotten better with age, surprisingly. When I first saw it, I thought it was too light and redundant, but it really is a cool movie. It's not nearly as dark (though it is violent) but the dinosaurs are still threatening and scary, especially the new Spinosaurus.
Rating: 7.5/10
#17 - Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory [1971]
A truly dark children's film. Between Wonka flipping out all the time to the nightmarish boat ride, this family classic deftly balances both light and dark comedy in a way few other films possess; Harold and Maude is a good comparison.
Rating: 10/10
#18 - The Hateful Eight [2015]
Double Feature, Part I
Featuring an incredible ensemble cast led by Kurt "The Man" Russell, Tarantino's 8th film is a violently funny murder mystery disguised as a western. The writing is so sharp and caustic, it brings these rich characters to life effortlessly. While it takes place almost entirely in the snow, it's gorgeous to look at thanks to superb cinematography. Ennio Morricone's outstanding score, which uses snippets from The Thing - my #2 of all time - keeps you on edge throughout the entire picture. For what it's worth, I still think Django Unchained is still superior and a better overall film.
Speaking of which, it feels like an old-school epic, I'm so glad Tarantino still makes these genre films, and makes them so damn good that they represent the best of said genre: crime dramas, spaghetti westerns, grindhouse exploitation flicks and samurai films. He refuses to let the genres die, which I have mad respect for.
Speaking of which, it feels like an old-school epic, I'm so glad Tarantino still makes these genre films, and makes them so damn good that they represent the best of said genre: crime dramas, spaghetti westerns, grindhouse exploitation flicks and samurai films. He refuses to let the genres die, which I have mad respect for.
Rating: 9/10
#19 - The Revanant [2015]
Double Feature, Part II
Prediction: SO EXCITED FOR THIS. Looks like a visual tour-de-force. I'm expecting it to be brutal and intense. I hope Leo wins the Oscar for this one!
Visually captivating and emotionally raw, The Revenant is a harsh and unforgiving survival tale for the ages and a harrowing journey through the blackest hearts of revenge. Very few words are spoken, but so much is said with the eyes, expressions and actions of the characters. Leo is spectacular as always, diving deep into the pure rage and seething hatred of Hugh Glass, making his continued survival believable and frankly quite frightening. As much as I'd love to see DiCaprio take home an Oscar for his relentless performance, I doubt he'll win given the character's minimal dialogue. We shall see. Tom Hardy's character is the abrasive son of a bitch responsible for most of Hugh's suffering, though his character is only trying to survive. The small supporting cast all do a stellar job, especially Domhnall Gleeson (who has been in THREE amazing films this year) as the leader of the hunting party.
If you've seen Birdman, you know how good Iñárritu is. Here we have stunning natural landscapes photographed impeccably, all using natural light - today that is unheard of. In addition we are treated to a number of astonishing and complex long takes that are technical marvels, including a brutal bear mauling that will leave you cringing. It's all set to a nerve-racking score that intensifies each and every scene. Lastly, there are multiple ways the film could be interpreted, some straightforward and others quite crytic, which only reinforces how damn good of a film it is. This is an experience worth enduring!
Visually captivating and emotionally raw, The Revenant is a harsh and unforgiving survival tale for the ages and a harrowing journey through the blackest hearts of revenge. Very few words are spoken, but so much is said with the eyes, expressions and actions of the characters. Leo is spectacular as always, diving deep into the pure rage and seething hatred of Hugh Glass, making his continued survival believable and frankly quite frightening. As much as I'd love to see DiCaprio take home an Oscar for his relentless performance, I doubt he'll win given the character's minimal dialogue. We shall see. Tom Hardy's character is the abrasive son of a bitch responsible for most of Hugh's suffering, though his character is only trying to survive. The small supporting cast all do a stellar job, especially Domhnall Gleeson (who has been in THREE amazing films this year) as the leader of the hunting party.
If you've seen Birdman, you know how good Iñárritu is. Here we have stunning natural landscapes photographed impeccably, all using natural light - today that is unheard of. In addition we are treated to a number of astonishing and complex long takes that are technical marvels, including a brutal bear mauling that will leave you cringing. It's all set to a nerve-racking score that intensifies each and every scene. Lastly, there are multiple ways the film could be interpreted, some straightforward and others quite crytic, which only reinforces how damn good of a film it is. This is an experience worth enduring!
Rating: 9.5/10
#20 - Cruel Intentions [1999]
Such a weird movie but it gave me boners as a kid, especially Sarah Michelle Gellar and Reese Witherspoon's perky bouncy knockers. Everyone is a manipulative bastard with no moral compass.
Rating: 6.5/10
#21 - Halloween [2007]
A surprisingly good remake from Rob Zombie. It explores Michael's childhood much more, showing who & what shaped him into the monster we know and love. The soundtrack and production design are distinctly and wonderfully 70s with a few of Zombie's Gothic twists thrown in.
Rating: 7.5/10
#22 - The Amityville Horror [2005]
Where Zombie's remake stayed true, The Amityville Horror goes off the rails in a much more chaotic direction that explains more but ultimately lessens the scares. The cast is a mixed bag. Ryan Reynolds is good and bad in equal measure, Melissa George is sexy as fuck and the kids appear legitimately terrified. Production design and editing is much more slick and fast-paced, to the film's detriment. Unlike a lot of horror remakes of the mid-2000's, this one is rated R and uses its rating decently. There's nothing too crazy to speak about, gore wise.
Rating: 6/10
#23 - Pontypool [2008]
As I've mentioned before, I'm a huge fan of zombies. Romero's "Unholy Trilogy", Fulci's Zombie, obscure titles like Nightmare City, Left 4 Dead, The Walking Dead, the list goes on. I can't exactly put my finger on why zombies are so interesting to me, but they are. I thought I had seen everything the zombie genre had to offer. I was wrong.
Pontypool is one of the most interesting and polarizing "zombie" films I've ever seen. It's not the best one, but it's originality and unique take on how the infection spreads make it one zombie film every horror fan needs to see. I will say this: you will either love it or hate it. After reading many reviews, it's clear that some people think it's brilliant while others think it's trash. I say give it a watch and decide for yourself.
The film is based off the novel "Pontypool Changes Everything" by Thomas Burgess, who also wrote the screenplay. While they both share the same writer, the book and the film are very different in terms of perspective. The film is more straightforward, but this is not a bad thing. The story takes place almost entirely inside a radio station in Pontypool, Ontario and follows the radio crew as the outbreak begins. Very little of the outbreak is actual shown, with most of the carnage being described verbally. This turns out to be extremely effective because the audience's imagination creates things way more terrifying than anything the filmmakers could've shown on-screen. I know this will turn some people away, but with all the in-your-face shaky-cam horror crap out nowadays, it was quite refreshing to be scared by something so simple.
I didn't want to give away major plot points, but they're why the film is so good and I want to address them - there's a reason I put the word zombie in quotation marks above. You have been warned:
**SPOILERS AHEAD**
The most intriguing aspect of the film is how the infection spreads: through the English language. It sounds stupid, but somehow it really works. Just the idea that speaking certain words can potentially turn you into a mindless, flesh-hungry creature is utterly terrifying. Some people may think this is ridiculous, but the way the film conveys it makes it seem very plausible. Our brains are just computers, right? Don't computers sometimes mess up, getting caught in endless loops or becoming infected with viruses, causing them to behave erratically? The notion that your brain can turn on you like that is very unnerving to me. The director has stated that the creatures aren't zombies but something else, dubbing them "conversationalists". Whether or not they can be considered zombies is up to you. Regardless, the methods they devise to combat the virus are ingenious and clever.
**END SPOILERS**
The film's cast also does a tremendous job. Stephen McHattie, who you might recognize from Watchmen, is outstanding in his role. He plays a former "shock-jock" forced to do morning traffic reports. McHattie's voice is almost hypnotizing and you hang on his every word, making what would be otherwise boring scenes very engrossing. Special mention must go to Rick Roberts, the actor who voices the radio crew's field reporter Ken Loney. We never see this character, but his vocal performance was so filled with genuine terror that I was literally on the edge of my seat. It actually creeped me out, something which doesn't happen very often. The rest of the cast does a fine job.
The cinematography looks fantastic. It has a very industrial feel to it, with lots of blues and greys, making scenes seem cold and unwelcoming. The snowy setting also increases the feeling of isolation. The score is minimal but highly effective, complementing the action and scares nicely. All of these things really enhance the film's atmosphere and make it all the more unsettling. The gore is minimal but well-done; if you're a gorehound, this is NOT the movie for you.
To sum things up, Pontypool is definitely a thinking man's zombie movie. It presents some very bizarre concepts that it makes the most of, really going for broke. If you're expecting standard zombie fare, you will either be very disappointed or (un)pleasantly surprised. It's a weird and interesting film that is definitely worth a look.
Pontypool is one of the most interesting and polarizing "zombie" films I've ever seen. It's not the best one, but it's originality and unique take on how the infection spreads make it one zombie film every horror fan needs to see. I will say this: you will either love it or hate it. After reading many reviews, it's clear that some people think it's brilliant while others think it's trash. I say give it a watch and decide for yourself.
The film is based off the novel "Pontypool Changes Everything" by Thomas Burgess, who also wrote the screenplay. While they both share the same writer, the book and the film are very different in terms of perspective. The film is more straightforward, but this is not a bad thing. The story takes place almost entirely inside a radio station in Pontypool, Ontario and follows the radio crew as the outbreak begins. Very little of the outbreak is actual shown, with most of the carnage being described verbally. This turns out to be extremely effective because the audience's imagination creates things way more terrifying than anything the filmmakers could've shown on-screen. I know this will turn some people away, but with all the in-your-face shaky-cam horror crap out nowadays, it was quite refreshing to be scared by something so simple.
I didn't want to give away major plot points, but they're why the film is so good and I want to address them - there's a reason I put the word zombie in quotation marks above. You have been warned:
**SPOILERS AHEAD**
The most intriguing aspect of the film is how the infection spreads: through the English language. It sounds stupid, but somehow it really works. Just the idea that speaking certain words can potentially turn you into a mindless, flesh-hungry creature is utterly terrifying. Some people may think this is ridiculous, but the way the film conveys it makes it seem very plausible. Our brains are just computers, right? Don't computers sometimes mess up, getting caught in endless loops or becoming infected with viruses, causing them to behave erratically? The notion that your brain can turn on you like that is very unnerving to me. The director has stated that the creatures aren't zombies but something else, dubbing them "conversationalists". Whether or not they can be considered zombies is up to you. Regardless, the methods they devise to combat the virus are ingenious and clever.
**END SPOILERS**
The film's cast also does a tremendous job. Stephen McHattie, who you might recognize from Watchmen, is outstanding in his role. He plays a former "shock-jock" forced to do morning traffic reports. McHattie's voice is almost hypnotizing and you hang on his every word, making what would be otherwise boring scenes very engrossing. Special mention must go to Rick Roberts, the actor who voices the radio crew's field reporter Ken Loney. We never see this character, but his vocal performance was so filled with genuine terror that I was literally on the edge of my seat. It actually creeped me out, something which doesn't happen very often. The rest of the cast does a fine job.
The cinematography looks fantastic. It has a very industrial feel to it, with lots of blues and greys, making scenes seem cold and unwelcoming. The snowy setting also increases the feeling of isolation. The score is minimal but highly effective, complementing the action and scares nicely. All of these things really enhance the film's atmosphere and make it all the more unsettling. The gore is minimal but well-done; if you're a gorehound, this is NOT the movie for you.
To sum things up, Pontypool is definitely a thinking man's zombie movie. It presents some very bizarre concepts that it makes the most of, really going for broke. If you're expecting standard zombie fare, you will either be very disappointed or (un)pleasantly surprised. It's a weird and interesting film that is definitely worth a look.
Rating: 8/10
#24 - Trainwreck [2015]
It still suffers from all of the problems that have plagued Apatow's films:, specifically the lengthy runtime, unlikable protagonists, lazy editing, etc. Apatow has trouble knowing when to cut a joke and the result is many scenes running too long for absolutely no reason. Another Apatow trademark as of late is unlikable protagonists, which rarely work because the line between being likable and being a dick is so thin. Here Schumer is brutally honest which is refreshing...in small doses. Her problem is she just doesn't know when to shut her mouth, which coincidentally parallels with Apatow's disregard for comedic editing or pacing. The funniest characters are all the supporting ones, which all work in small doses. Apatow, hire a better editor or know when to cut a scene that isn't working. Bill Hader is earnest and funny; with him also voicing Fear in Inside Out and BB-8 in The Force Awakens, he has proved quite versatile this year. Overall, worth a watch but wait for cable.
Rating: 6.5/10
#25 - Galaxy of Terror [1981]
My favorite Roger Corman movie features one of the my favorite concepts: fears manifesting themselves. Here, things are quite lurid but the ingenuity is commendable. James Cameron worked on this and created many of the film's special effects and sets, cheaply and quickly, which pleased Corman immensely. The cast is good, including Roy Stevenson from Fast Times, Robert Englund and Sid Haig. Add in the healthy serving luscious 80s titties and we have a winner that never fails to satisfy!
Rating: 8/10
#26 - The Big Short [2015]
A shocking look at the 2007-08 economic crisis and how greed and lack of accountability caused it. Bale is great as the eccentric hedge fund manager who discover the economy is going to collapse based on suspect mortgage and banking practices. Carell plays against type as a cantankerous fellow manager while Pitt is restrained and monotone (much like Liev Schreiber's character in Spotlight) and Gosling is just...there. It tries to make the more complicated monetary concepts easier to understand by humorously breaking the fourth wall and having famous celebrities explain the concepts in simple ways. It's an odd narrative technique I found condescending and immersion-breaking, a cardinal celluloid sin. Overall, it's definitely worth a watch, but it's not Best Picture-worthy.
Rating: 7/10
#27 - The World's End [2013]
Sharp witty dialogue delivered exceptionally well by the cast especially Simon Pegg. Love the nods to classic science fiction films like Invasion of the Body Snatchers, Westworld and The Thing. Fluid fight choreography that is shot kinetically but steadily so you can watch the entire scene unfold. Edgar Wright's trademark fast paced propels a surprisingly deep character study punctuated by biting social commentary. My only nitpick is that they should've used green as the dominant alien color instead of blue.
Rating: 10/10
#28 - Labyrinth [1986]
With the unfortunate passing of musical legend David Bowie, I had to watch Labyrinth. It is a fantasy marvel, with lavish production design, imaginative puppetry and a magical vibe that is hard to match. Bowie is charmingly sinister as the goblin King, the perfect choice for the role of this eternal creature. The bog of eternal stench and the metal tunnel cleaners are and ingenious and creative highlight for me. I miss stuff like this as you just don't find it in films anymore.
Rating: 10/10
#29 - Predator 2 [1990]
Love this sequel. It goes a completely different path compared to the first one by moving to the urban city setting, with interesting results. Gnarly new Predator technology like the smart disc, telescoping spear, net gun, and medical kit. Danny Glover is hilarious, and the movie is way more hilarious if you just pretend he's Murtaugh from Lethal Weapon. The supporting cast is decent, especially Bill Paxton trying to replicate his Hudson schtick as a young cop partnered with Glover and Gary Busey as a man-in-black investigating the Predator. The ending is also amazing, with the Predator spacecraft, the skull trophy case (including a Xenomorph) and the gathering of Predators takes the movie from good to great. All these things combine to create a deep universe that just begs to be explored. We need another Predator movie...
Rating: 8.5/10
#30 - Idle Hands [1999]
Corny but fun horror-comedy released in the late 90's that'll always have nostalgic appeal for me. Objectively, it's a decent modern slasher with tons of black humor thrown in, in fact it's clearly inspired by Evil Dead II with all the severed hand stuff. The cast is solid with Devon Sawa, Jessica Alba (who is SO fuckably innocent here), Seth Green and Vivica A. Fox are all pretty memorable. The gore is above-average and pulled off practically, which is a bonus.
Rating: 6.5/10
#31 - Alien 3 [1992]
Fincher's crack at the series is bleak, dirty and unrelenting, aiming more for the tone of the original 1979 film. The result is a mixed bag and visually repugnant, however when you learn of the infamous studio meddling demanding Fincher (a first time Hollywood director) make major ill-advised changes to the script and final film, you can give it a pass. It's still a decent Alien film, even if it can't compete with the first two, which are undisputed modern classics.
Rating: 7.5/10
#32 - Spotlight [2015]
A fascinating but horrifying look at the hypocrisy of the Catholic Church. It follows the Boston Globe's Spotlight team, who investigated and broke the story of molestation within the church, and the church's efforts to cover it up. Michael Keaton, liev Schreiber and Mark Ruffalo are all excellent, as is the rest of the ensemble cast. The subject matter is just so interesting, and it is approached with maturity and objectivity. It's scary because if the Catholic Church, supposedly one of the most honorable organizations around, is capable of such disgusting things, just imagine what we don't know about the thousands of other organizations out there.
Rating: 8/10
#33 - Room [2015]
Very good movie that didn't follow genre clichés and was actually quite touching. Brie Larson was outstanding and so was Jacob Tremblay who portrayed the kid. The supporting cast is excellent too, really. Visually it was very boring, but the drama is front and center here so it didn't matter. Best Picture, no. Best Actress for Larson? A definite possibility.
Rating: 8.5/10
#34 - Love & Mercy [2015]
A fascinating look inside the mind of Brian Wilson, creative force behind pretty much everything The Beach Boys did. It simultaneously follows Wilson through the 1960's during his experimental period and the 1980's as a broken man controlled by his manipulative therapist, Dr. Eugene Landy. This unconventional approach to doing a biopic works surprisingly well because both segments mirror one another in numerous ways thanks to the smart script. It also focuses on the technical aspects of audio engineering and production, which I found extremely intriguing considering I'm an audiophile.
Paul Dano is brilliant as 60's Wilson, portraying him as a timid musical virtuoso fractured by his demanding family and colleagues. Cusack plays 80's Wilson, showing us the damage this sort of mental abuse can cause. I was also impressed by Elizabeth Banks as Wilson's second wife, Melinda Ledbetter (great name, huh?). She shows that despite her bubbly, air-headed media persona, she is one hell of an actress. Finally, a biopic about Brian Wilson wouldn't be complete without a groovy soundtrack right? We get one featuring many of the Beach Boys hits used in interesting ways (and a new song written by Brian Wilson for the film), in addition to a superb original score from the underrated Atticus Ross.
This is a must watch if you're a fan of music at all.
Rating: 9/10
#35 - Knowing [2009]
Alex Proyas is a visionary, swooping onto the scene in 1994 with The Crow and followed it up with one of best science fiction films ever made with 1998's Dark City. He's lost some of his magic touch since then, but you can't deny that I, Robot was fun and entertaining even with Will Smith as the lead. This brings me to Knowing, Proyas' unsettling end of the world thriller. It's unique and cryptic, but endlessly watchable because it sets up the mystery well to keep you guessing. Nic Cage probably wasn't the best choice for the lead role, as his face is amusing when he's confused, which is most of the time. He's not bad, just not ideal. The special effects are top-notch, with two set pieces featuring vehicle crashes that are terrifying, one of which is an impressively complex long take. The ending is bleak and weird but surely memorable. Definitely worth a watch!
Rating: 7/10
#36 - Deathgasm [2015]
Loving, blood-soaked homage to Evil Dead and Braindead with a gnarly heavy metal paint job. Excellent gore effects done practically, a decent Kiwi cast, titties and a brutal soundtrack.
Rating: 7.5/10
#37 - The Final Girls [2015]
A creative meta-horror film that plays with the genre rules in clever ways, much like The Cabin In The Woods. The cast is excellent, mostly made up of unknowns except for Malin Akerman and Taissa Farmiga. Adam Devine is hysterically obnoxious as Kurt while Angela Trimbur is fuckably ditzy with a tight ass. A group of teens get sucked into a Friday The 13th-esque cult horror film and must survive until the end and escape the movie. Think Last Action Hero, but for the horror genre. It looks and sounds exactly like an 80's horror flick, with a bodacious synthesizer score and manic direction. The less said about The Final Girls, the better. If you're a horror lover, drop what you're doing and go rent this right meow!
Rating: 9/10
#38 - Bone Tomahawk [2015]
An eclectic ensemble cast of actors I love including Kurt Russell, Matthew Fox, Patrick Wilson, and Richard Jenkins who all do a phenomenal job. There's a ton of beautiful, sweeping landscape shots. The unforgiving terrain and arid, dreadful atmosphere make it feel like hell. The violence is brutal and the tone is harsh and bleak. It was definitely a tough life being a cowboy despite how John Wayne or Clint Eastwood portrayed it. I love how modern Westerns have become more realistic and unflinching.
Like Sicario, this is a slowburn movie. At 132 minutes it is very long with stretches of no dialogue but it works because it lulls you into a sense of security and then boom, something outrageous happens. Matthew Fox is awesome and scary as John Brooder, an Indian slaying badass with a death wish. Wow this just took a crazy turn into a horror movie. The sound/roar these troglodyte things make is terrifying and sonorous. They have throat implants made from teeth and metal that allow them to make these sounds. Holy fuck that was probably the worst way to die ever, being scalped, impaled through the mouth with a spike, bisected vertically starting at the genitals while alive and then eaten. And the fucking character's name was Nick goddamn. Whew. The horror Western is such a cool melding of genres. It's scary because the life and land was already unforgiving and the lack of communication and harshness of travel make it so easy to set a horror tale in the deep snowy woods or the desert because of the isolation factor. Damn this was a good movie. I may have to amend my Top 15.
Rating: 9/10
#39 - Invincible [2006]
A feel good football movie starring Mark Wahhhhhllllberg as Eagles wide receiver Vince Papale. The 70's setting is well-realized and accompanied by a groovy soundtrack. It follows the established formula but does so well enough to entertain. It's harmless fluff.
Rating: 7/10
#40 - Cloud Atlas [2012]
Date Watched: 1/17/16
Six stories intertwine as time jumps around in this web of drama, deceit and love. The cast is phenomenal, with each actor playing at least 4 to 5 different roles, some completely unrecognizable like Haley Berry. The stories are all captivating, despite them taking place a multitude of years apart. Ambitious and a bit preachy, but it is an experience. It's not a 10/10 like I originally rated it, but this is definitely worth watching if you're craving something challenging.
Rating: 8/10
#41 - Roar [1981]
Date Watched: 1/18/16
Holy shit this movie is IN-SANE. It features hundreds of untrained lions and tigers interacting with the visibly terrified cast, with some of them and the crew getting injured. The cast includes Tippi Hedren and Melanie Griffith because of the family ties, both of whom were bitten or slashed at least once. Jan de Bont, director of Speed and Twister was DP on this movie and got fucking SCALPED by a lion. He needed over 200 stitches. I kept hearing how crazy this flick was and it did not disappoint. The lions, tigers, panthers and leopards are very curious, jumping, knocking down and biting any human nearby. When they're pissed, it is terrifying...they are so fast and could tear you to pieces in a heartbeat if they feel like it. There's one scene with a guy on the motorbike riding alongside the running tigers, with them trying to knock him off. It's not just big cats either, the elephants are territorial, strong and scary! One destroys a metal boat with the characters on it like it was paper mache. I will never look at Dumbo the same way again.
I have no clue how they convinced the cast to participate in this considering the dangers and high chance of death. It has abrupt total shifts between creature terror and hammy sentimental comedy. The music is hilariously ridiculous, with pro- conservation and environmental messages. It ends on a happy note with both man and beast living in harmony, and it is kind of cool to see someone snoozing on a bed with a lion just like they would a dog or a large stuffed animal. For sheer balls and boldness, this movie has no equal.
I have no clue how they convinced the cast to participate in this considering the dangers and high chance of death. It has abrupt total shifts between creature terror and hammy sentimental comedy. The music is hilariously ridiculous, with pro- conservation and environmental messages. It ends on a happy note with both man and beast living in harmony, and it is kind of cool to see someone snoozing on a bed with a lion just like they would a dog or a large stuffed animal. For sheer balls and boldness, this movie has no equal.
Rating: 8/10
#42 - Super Troopers [2001]
Broken Lizard's best movie sends up cops and authority with crude humor and hilariously quotable dialogue. The main five do a great job, with Kevin Heffernan stealing the show as goofy, ill-tempered man-child with a badge, Rod Farva. This is one of the best comedies of the 2000's.
Rating: 8.5/10
#43 - Steve Jobs [2015]
Fassbender is fantastic; smart, ruthless, calculating and indefatigable in portraying Jobs as an ingratiating know-it-all with a singular vision. Like all great biopics, it focuses on the man and his flaws, which were both a blessing and a curse. His failings only spurred him to try harder, with determination most of us wish we had.
Rating: 8/10
#44 - Sisters [2015]
Funny but not hilarious. I notice a trend of modern comedies dealing with the fear of getting old by showing adults regressing into the teenager/college kid mentality, drinking, smoking and fucking like Jason Voorhees is coming. It was great in Judd Apatow's The 40-Year-Old Virgin (10 years ago!) but by the time This Is 40 rolled around, this base concept became old hat...it's time for some new material Judd! Anywho...
Sisters is a step above Apatow's recent comedic attempts, but not by much. Despite Tina Fey and Amy Poehler's perfect chemistry, the film never finds its true footing because Paula Pell's script can't decide what kind of movie it wants to be. It doesn't go all out like Neighbors did a year early, and a lot of the jokes get recycled too often so it underwhelms. Perhaps Fey and Poehler should've taken a crack at the screenplay. John Cena is the funniest part in both this and Trainwreck. Worth rental, nothing more.
Rating: 6/10
#45 - Freddy vs Jason [2003]
I absolutely love/ this movie. It is a dream come true, matching up Jason Voorhees against Freddy Krueger in a bloody battle to the death. How they end up together is quite complicated. Freddie no longer has power because no one fears him, so he lures Jason to Elm Street to kill teenagers so they begin to believe in him again. Freddy's plan backfires as Jason cannot be controlled and the two must duke it out, mano y mano. Unlike most versus movies, we don't have to wait until the end to see Jason and Freddy fight. They have numerous encounters that keeps the story moving. I love how it plays as a Friday the 13th movie and a Nightmare on Elm Street movie simultaneously. Robert Englund returns and plays Mr. Krueger exceptionally well here. Ken Kirzinger makes for an imposing Jason without Kane Hodder being available. Tons of blood & guts are spilled and the final showdown between the two horror heavyweights is everything I hoped it would be, creative and brutal.
Rating: 8/10
#46 - The Visit [2015]
A return to form of sorts for M. Night Shyamalan. it's nothing remarkable, but it does feature a few chills and scares along the way. The found footage format has gotten old, and here it's passable but offers nothing new. Despite the goofy trailer, it actually does get quite unsettling at times, particularly the nail-biting ending. The comedy is hit or miss. I thought things were going to take a more supernatural angle, only to be confronted with a home invasion angle. It was underwhelming.
Rating: 6.5/10
#47 - Everest [2015]
It's been a while since we had a good old-fashioned mountain adventure film. The cast is surprisingly good with Jake Gyllenhaal, Jason Clarke and Josh Brolin. The mountain climbing scenes are perilous and intense.
Rating: 7/10
❄️ BLIZZARD ❄️
#48 - The Last Witch Hunter [2015]
I like the dark fantasy vibe. Having the witches powers be based in the four elements was really nifty plus it keeps things visually interesting (especially green) with their potions, charms and botany skills. Vin Diesel is earnest and slyly funny as Kaulder, the eponymous 800-year-old witch hunter. Diesel is a big geek at heart and clearly loves playing these archetypal badasses, giving us a number of memorable antiheroes like Riddick. The remaining cast is good: Michael Caine as an Alfred-esque manservant, Elijah Wood as his successor and Ygritte from Game of Thrones as a good witch helping.
The Witch Queen makes for a formidable villainess with her plague-stricken, infested appearance and control over these paralytic bee/fly insects. Mortally linking Kaulder and the Witch Queen via her heart is a truly nefarious plan where he must die to destroy her. I love her spinal cord hair/tail.
Outstanding production designs and world building. I like how they don't over explain the witch world, only what's necessary. It gives it an ancient, almost Lovecraftian, feel with a deep mythic lore. I noticed some striking religious imagery that worked well with the story like the Gaelic design of the Axe and Cross emblem. I dug the witch counsel and that Sentinel gate keeper thing was fucking crazy! A golem like creature made from bones, rocks and wood with a demonic spike-lined mouth. It's one of the most creative creatures I've seen in quite some time. The hell portals are a wild touch, with Cthulhu / Sarlacc-like tentacles to drag in its victims.
All the witch magic is cool: shape-shifting, concealment spells, weather stones (brilliantly illustrated in an early expository travel scene), hallucinatory flashbacks and hypnotic illusions. I also fucking loved Kaulder's secret armory filled with all sorts of magical toys of destruction. The baddies resurrect the Witch Queen using a tree like cocoon where she then bursts from inside her host, Hellraiser-style. The basic storyline reminds me a lot of Vampires, which I watched recently.
Slick and beautiful cinematography, with an accompanying mythical score that would make Tolkien proud. I also really enjoyed the cover of paint it black during the end credits. The witch make-up and CGI are top-notch, with the witches dying fiery, ashen deaths a la the vamps in Blade II. I was surprised by the large amount of practical effects.
I'm not understanding why people didn't dig this movie. It's the perfect dark fantasy adventure. It's leaps and bounds better then twilight or any other young adult shit currently out there. Audiences are so damn fickle. Regardless, if you dig dark fantasy films you need to check this out immediately!
The Witch Queen makes for a formidable villainess with her plague-stricken, infested appearance and control over these paralytic bee/fly insects. Mortally linking Kaulder and the Witch Queen via her heart is a truly nefarious plan where he must die to destroy her. I love her spinal cord hair/tail.
Outstanding production designs and world building. I like how they don't over explain the witch world, only what's necessary. It gives it an ancient, almost Lovecraftian, feel with a deep mythic lore. I noticed some striking religious imagery that worked well with the story like the Gaelic design of the Axe and Cross emblem. I dug the witch counsel and that Sentinel gate keeper thing was fucking crazy! A golem like creature made from bones, rocks and wood with a demonic spike-lined mouth. It's one of the most creative creatures I've seen in quite some time. The hell portals are a wild touch, with Cthulhu / Sarlacc-like tentacles to drag in its victims.
All the witch magic is cool: shape-shifting, concealment spells, weather stones (brilliantly illustrated in an early expository travel scene), hallucinatory flashbacks and hypnotic illusions. I also fucking loved Kaulder's secret armory filled with all sorts of magical toys of destruction. The baddies resurrect the Witch Queen using a tree like cocoon where she then bursts from inside her host, Hellraiser-style. The basic storyline reminds me a lot of Vampires, which I watched recently.
Slick and beautiful cinematography, with an accompanying mythical score that would make Tolkien proud. I also really enjoyed the cover of paint it black during the end credits. The witch make-up and CGI are top-notch, with the witches dying fiery, ashen deaths a la the vamps in Blade II. I was surprised by the large amount of practical effects.
I'm not understanding why people didn't dig this movie. It's the perfect dark fantasy adventure. It's leaps and bounds better then twilight or any other young adult shit currently out there. Audiences are so damn fickle. Regardless, if you dig dark fantasy films you need to check this out immediately!
Rating: 8.5/10
#49 - Resident Evil: Afterlife [2010]
I've always loved the Resident Evil movies. They're not faithful adaptations of the awesome games, but they do borrow many creatures and characters for slick sci-fi action thrills. They are not ashamed to be cheesy and over the top, but still violent and creative resulting in quite the 3D crowd-pleaser.
Rating: 7/10
#50 - Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse [2015]
Off kilter and scary simultaneously, this zom-com is a gory, vulgar good time, akin to Zombieland and Dawn/Shaun of the Dead. There are plenty of chunky headshot sand zombie mayhem to satisfy your inner gorehound. The patient editing and numerous complex tracking shots that hint at director Christopher B. Landon's abilities. I have to say the unknown actors do a damn fine job, delivering solid and non-stereotypical performances. The writing is smarter than your average comedy plus there's plenty of nods to the zombie classics like Romero's Unholy Trilogy. I love that the zombie virus affects other species like deer and cats. Denise the "cocktail waitress"/big tittied stripper is another strong female badass who can more than handle her own! Love that 2015 was the year of female empowerment in films! Holy shit the zombie attack of the black lid senior party club is exactly like the opening scene from blade but with zombies! It's so cool!
Rating: 8.5/10
#51 - Aladdin [1992]
Still my favorite Disney movie, Aladdin is simultaneously hilarious and touching, with stunning animation and perfect voice acting. The musical numbers are also among the best, with "You Ain't Never Had A Friend Like Me" being my favorite.
Rating: 9.5/10
#52 - The Fifth Element [1997]
A truly awesome 90's sci-fi film, thanks to an epic story, a clever and witty script and brilliant casting choices. Bruce Willis is outstanding as always, displaying his trademark abrasive charm. Milla Jovovich is sexy and sweet and LeeLoo, while also being able to kick plenty of ass on her own. Besson regular Gary Oldman is delightfully fiendish as Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg, the flamboyant and unpredictable villain. He is quotable and funny, a rare combination making for a memorable bad guy. Ian Holm gives the goings-on some class and Chris Tucker is hilarious as the screeching, motor-mouthed Ruby Rhod, who you will either love or loathe.
The action is kinetic and exciting, thanks to creative use of the film's universe of flying cars, spaceships, aliens and futuristic technology. Speaking of, the film's world building is excellent, updating old technology in practical ways, while also giving us a lot of cool weapons, vehicles and tech to satisfy and impress. I always loved Zorg's ZF-1, an incredible multiweapon outfitted with bullets, arrows, rockets, nets, a flamethrower and a goddamn FREEZE RAY. As a kid, I wanted that gun so bad to play with!
Rating: 10/10
#53 - Me and Earl and the Dying Girl [2015]
Reminds me of Wes Andersen's style with all the subtitles, quirky long takes and wide static shots, mixed with Edgar Wright's rapid editing style and Michel Gondry's surrealism. Love the Ssweded art house Criterion remakes:
Like Greg's Dawn of the Dead patch and hipstery feel that doesn't get annoying. Love the soundtrack, especially the snippets of Ennio Morricone's Dollars score and Nilsson. The unorthodox nature of everything is inviting, like Jon Bernthal's ex-con history teacher or the existence of Ill Phil. Earl and Greg's friendship is the epitome of this. Both are from completely different backgrounds but form a strong bond over classic cinema. Speaks a lot to the current state of racism and maybe we're not so different. The characters all feel genuine, delivering stellar performances. The drama and emotion are serious but not overly sentimental.
Rating: 8/10
#54 - What We Do In The Shadows [2015]
Hilarious send up of vampires and their many genre tropes. A witty script propels the sly shenanigans through the surprisingly droll everyday lives of vampires. Perfect casting and impressive direction from Watita, which makes me excited for his upcoming Thor: Ragnarok.
Rating: 8.5/10
#55 - Trollhunter [2010]
I absolutely love this Norwegian sci-fi film, presented as a documentary following Hans the Troll Hunter. It's depicted as dirty work. Amazing world building from top to bottom. It makes it feel like trolls actually exist. The description of the trolls, the lore and the little details are incredible. Great production design and effects, especially when the trolls turn to stone. The troll designs are scary and grotesque, all pulling from Norwegian myths. All of Hans' troll hunting technology is wild and fun.
Rating: 9.5/10
#56 - The Thing [1982]
I had to watch The Thing since we got snowed in! Amazing as always. This time around, I developed a theory that Nauls was infected early on, which could explain how Palmer or Norris or even Blair became infected. As the cook, he was handling the food prep so he could've dripped blood into certain character's meals to infect them with no one the wiser. This is also supported by dialogue between MacReady and Fuchs: "If one particle is enough to infect someone, everyone should prepare their own food and I suggest we only eat out of cans." We never see anyone actually eating or cooking (except maybe in the rec room in the beginning) so this line of dialogue always stuck out a little to me. Also, we never see what happens to Nauls before the Blair-Thing shows up...he wanders off and then just disappears. A bit weird considering they show Garry's assimilation, so why not Nauls? Since he was infected, I think he and Blair merged to create the Super Blair-Thing that attacks MacReady at the end.
Additionally, I believe Childs was definitely infected at the end for two reasons: 1. his coat changed colors from blue to tan which would suggest The Thing tore though his clothes as it assimilated him, thereby requiring a new coat to avoid suspicion, and 2. MacReady's laugh and body language after Childs' drinks the scotch. Earlier in the film, after MacReady records his audio logs, there is a quick shot where he picks up the scotch bottle, looks at it and gets the idea to fill it with something non-drinkable (like kerosene, petrol or oil) in order to secretly test those who drink it. Obviously Mac couldn't try this with the whole group, but the opportunity presented itself with Childs at the end. The Thing wouldn't know what scotch or petrol tastes like and wouldn't react in disgust like a human would, thereby unmasking it as an imitation. Mac laughs after Childs drinks the "scotch" because his "scotch test" proved Childs is a Thing.
This is why I love The Thing so much. It is expertly crafted by Carpenter to create the perfect amount of ambiguity to heighten the paranoia and fear the characters are feeling. Anybody could be The Thing and you'd never know unless it revealed itself. Lastly, while I always gush over Rob Bottin's incredible special effects, I must mention DoP Dean Cundey's impeccable cinematography that creates a feeling of extreme isolation with its stark blue and red hues. He brings Outpost 31 to life, making the labyrinthine station its own character.
Rating: 10/10
#57 - Starship Troopers [1997]
Lots of movies from 1997 recently. Anyway my mom wanted to go to take me to see this in theaters but I chickened out because I used to be scared of this kind of stuff. I know, crazy right? Now I can watch people get ripped to shreds with buckets of blood and not bat an eye. My how times have changed. And that's not an indictment of cinematic violence, merely that I grew up.
Anyway... Starship Troopers is the third and final entry in Paul Verhoeven's "Sci-Fecta", his amazing trilogy of science fiction classics including RoboCop and Total Recall. Like those films, it is over-the-top and violent, but also one hell of a thrill ride. The special effects are incredible, as expected, and is one of the early instances of CGI being used masterfully. The cast is great, even if the actors are hit or miss. Their characters are stereotypical but memorable nonetheless. Michael Ironside and stands out as a hardass teacher/soldier.
Visually things look amazing, and I love the commentary on the military-industrial complex, global politics and world policing, delivered in scathing fashion by Verhoeven. The production design is superb, from the spaceships and space stations to the alien planets and the bugs themselves. There are multiple types of bugs, each with their own military equivalent. The arachnids represent infantry, the tankers represent tanks or heavy artillery, the flying bugs represent aerial fighters while the brain bug clearly represents the leader ship. It paints an interesting dichotomy between man and bug, despite our difference in appearance. I also adore Basil Poledouris' stirringly triumphant score and I find myself humming from time to time.
Rating: 9/10
#58 - Dante's Peak [1997]
Another film from '97! This and Volcano both came out in 1997. The same thing happened later in 1998 with Armageddon and Deep Impact. It's weird how movies seem to come out in pairs, but I think it has something to do with the fact that once a property is in development, someone else may develop it or try to sell it to multiple people, or just steal it from someone else resulting in intellectual property theft. Still, it's not an isolated incident as it continues to happen.
Like Volcano, the film is a throwback to 70's disasterfests. It features impressive special effects but the cast leaves something to be desired. Pierce Brosnan is fine, but everyone else is pretty forgettable except the grandma character.
Rating: 7/10
#59 - Sinister 2 [2015]
About on par with the original. It does nothing new, but it does up the ante in terms of the disturbing snuff films and drama, something that takes up a little too much time in my opinion. I know it develops the characters and makes them feel real, but in a modern horror movie, we know the drill so just deliver the scares as promised.
Also like the first one, the film relies too heavily on musically-cued jump scares, a lazy horror filmmaking tactic that should've died long ago. True horror gets under your skin when you think about it. After you realize something's going to jump out for a cheap scare once the unnerving music stops, these boo-scare boogeymen lose all their scaring power. It's so fucking predictable. The abusive dad character made my blood boil and derserved a much more horrific death for being an entitled, ill-tempered, meat-headed asshole.
Also like the first one, the film relies too heavily on musically-cued jump scares, a lazy horror filmmaking tactic that should've died long ago. True horror gets under your skin when you think about it. After you realize something's going to jump out for a cheap scare once the unnerving music stops, these boo-scare boogeymen lose all their scaring power. It's so fucking predictable. The abusive dad character made my blood boil and derserved a much more horrific death for being an entitled, ill-tempered, meat-headed asshole.
Rating: 5/10
#60 - Cape Fear [1994]
De Niro is batshit insane. Combined with Scorsese's superb direction, it keeps you on edge. Worthy recreation of Bernard Hermann's sinister score.
Rating: 8.5/10
#61 - Avengers: Age of Ultron [2015]
Flawed and bloated with empty ideas, Whedon's follow-up to The Avengers could have been so cool. Sadly it squanders its immense potential on a muddled script and a hackneyed editing attempt by the studio that end up butchering the final film past the point of no return. Visually, the film looks like a dust-covered turd, a mix of brown and grey that's just visually repugnant.
It does have some redeeming qualities, such as the exciting action sequences involving most of the characters (though they seem to come along every 20 minutes so people don't get bored). I also enjoyed the subplots of Black Widow and The Hulk being a kismet couple and the slowly building tension between Captain America and Tony Stark that will feed into the Captain America: Civil War storyline.
The executive meddling ultimately doomed this picture. I would love to see a lengthy director's cut of Whedon's original vision containing the excised Thor subplot, but who knows when that'll surface. Hopefully Marvel (and Disney) learn from their miscues for future titles, though I wouldn't hold your breath.
Rating: 5.5/10
#62 - Backdraft [1991]
My favorite Ron Howard movie. It has balls, an A-list cast and some of the most impressive pyrotechnic effects you'll ever see in a motion picture.
Rating: 9/10
#63 - The Hitcher [1986]/[2006]
Watched both the original and the remake, specifically for the car chase/helicopter scenes. The original is a brilliant piece of vehicular carnage that is beautifully captured and exciting as fuck. The remake is done with real cars but the editing is terrible. It could've been so much better. As films, the original is better by leaps and bounds. Rutger Hauer is such an unpredictable villain with unclear motives, which makes his character of John Ryder scary as shit because you never know what he's going to do. The tension is palpable as Jim and Nash are repeatedly attacked (and helped) by this mysterious hitcher.
Rating: 8/10
#64 - The Hitcher [2007]
As mentioned above, this remake is cookie cutter to a fault, but it does change the fates of a few of the characters so it wasn't totally pointless, though it really undermines Jim's character in a dude-in-distress. He's no C. Thomas Howell. Sean Bean's Ryder is stoic and flat, coming off as an empty killer with no sense of purpose. He might as well be Michael Myers or Jason Voorhees, which just feels redundant. The car chase is edited like an MTV music video, set to Nine Inch Nails' "Closer"(which is admittedly a nice touch). The leads are totally interchangeable with the myriad of other CW-bound young faces. Just watch the original instead.
Rating: 4.5/10
#65 - The Other Guys [2010]
So fucking funny. It sends up every single cop cliche in the book. The chemistry between Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell is outstanding, almost as good as Jake and Elwood. The beginning with Sam Jackson & The Rock are also hysterical with some of the best quotes.
Rating: 8.5/10
#66 - Tron: Legacy [2010]
So damn creative and cool. A worthy sequel that updates the setting to modern times but still retains the quality and technical prowess that made the original such a cult classic. In addition, the score by Daft Punk is incredible, a stellar techno-pop mix of catchy action beats and elegant dramatic pieces that intrinsically fit this digital domain. Magnificent production design, with expansion of the universe crafted by the 1982 original, including light jets and other nifty technology.
Date Watched: 2/1/16
Talk about a disturbing film. Like House of the Devil, it feels like a horror film pulled straight from the 1970s, complete with gooseflesh inducing score and radical devil worshiping undertones. Think Rosemary's Baby and The Wicker Man – None of that fucking woman punching, bee-hating Nicolas Cage nonsense. Alexandra Essoe gives an incredibly dedicated, star-making performance. Her transformation is slow but extremely convincing.
Date Watched: 2/1/16
Spielberg finally made up for the queef fart that was Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Tintin is a riproaring adventure in the vein of Indiana Jones, with our heroes pursuing a lost relic and treasure as they try to elude crazy villains. The final action scene is a technical marvel, taking place as one unbroken take as Tintin & Co. are chased throughout a city as it crumbles around them, all in 3D. After viewing this, I decided to purchase a 3D TV.
Date Watched: 2/1/16
Really good effects, it mimics many classic disaster movies. The initial earthquake and subsequent tsunami speedboat breach are both showstoppers that managed to impress in the age of CGI overload. The Rock is earnest and Alexandra Daddario has the most amazing titties have ever seen. Having Carla Gugino be her mom is the perfect mother daughter combo.
Date Watched: 2/2/16
Depp is fantastic as James "Whitey" Bulger, quite a transformation. His dead, shark-like eyes give him an ominous, calculating glare. The rest of the ensemble cast is excellent, specifically Edgerton as John Connolly (love the accent). It keeps the characters grounded and the life of Whitey front and center,
It tries a bit too hard to emulate Goodfellas at times, but to be honest that's not necessarily a bad thing. Goodfellas is arguably the best mob movie ever (The Godfather I & II and The Untouchables are in the conversation) so at least the filmmakers are striving for gold, evidenced by superb musical selections that would make Scorsese proud. Bluntly violent, but shows the ruthlessness and paranoia these criminals are capable of. It's frightening to have someone you trust calmly lie to your face and then coldly shoot you in the back.
Date Watched: 2/3/16
I'm a huge fan of the Goosebumps book series, renting them from the library as a boy and collecting the ones I really liked. Then I was given the entire original series in mint condition by a friend so now I've got them all. For a kid who was scared of pretty much everything, these novels were the perfect gateway into the horror realm.
Anyway, the movie does the books proud as a campy, self-aware family adventure that brings together all of R.L. Stine's monsters and creations by having them be released from within the books themselves. It's all very meta which may turn off those hoping for a more traditional adaptation, but I found it to be refreshing.
All the memorable monsters are represented, but unfortunately they take a backseat to Stine's more recent creations. I was hoping for more classic monsters from the original run. Having them be led by Slappy the dummy was reminiscent of the 90's TV series, as he was in at least three separate stories. Loved the T-1000 esque killer lawn gnomes and their Army of Darkness style goofiness. It's a good balance of horror and comedy, exactly like the source material.
Date Watched: 2/3/16
Senator Showing
Date Watched: 2/4/16
An amazing animated feature from Brad Bird in his directorial debut. It deals with its subject matter maturely and delicately, never feeling preachy (unlike his 2015 film Tomorrowland) while the animation is absolutely gorgeous. A must-watch.
Date Watched: 2/5/16
Mel Brooks' send-up of the Star Wars trilogy remains funny throughout, acting as the perfect example of how to do a spoof properly.
Date Watched: 2/6/16
I've watched all the X-Men films recently (except The Last Stand and Origins: Wolverine which are mediocre and cinematic diarrhea, respectively) and while I used to maintain X2 was the best, I believe First Class is now superior. It's more fun, the actors are better and the action setpieces are much more creative and thrilling than anything in Singer's films. Fassbender is utterly badass as Magneto, playing him with a cunning, slightly sadistic enjoyment echoing 007. It treats the characters with respect and allows each of them to shine with their unique powers.
Date Watched: 2/7/16
Raunchy, profane and surprisingly sentimental, Role Models message of being yourself, letting your freak flag fly, is admirable. The laughs are plentiful from Rudd and Scott's brotherly chemistry to the supporting cast including Jane Lynch, Ken Jeong and Joe Lo Truglio. I personally loved all the Kiss music and jokes, especially the Destroyer-esque ending.
Date Watched: 2/8/16
Hilarious stoner comedy that always gets unjustly shit upon. Being a big fan of fantasy films like The Beastmaster, Labyrinth, Return To Oz and The Lord of the Rings trilogy, I find Your Highness to be a delightfully tongue-in-cheek spoof that is a fun fantasy adventure on top of being a comedy. Seriously, give this one a shot.
Date Watched: 2/9/16
First Rare Exports and now Big Game, Finnish writer-director Jalmari Helander has impressed from the get-go, and is someone to keep an eye on in the future. Big Game is an instant action classic, joining the ranks of the very films it is homaging, which is the highest honor. Onni Tommila is earnest as a young hunter trying to prove himself by rescuing the President of the United States, played intelligently by Sam Jackson. The action is exciting and creative, and visually things have a First Blood/Predator look with the lush mountain forests of Finland. The less said about this film the better. If you like 80's action movies, check this out!
Date Watched: 2/9/16
Hockey movies aren't exactly a hot commodity in the U.S., sorry my Canadian brethren, but if you're going to watch just one (and you're not 10 years old), make it Slap Shot, one of Paul Newman's finest performances. The comedy reminds me a lot of John Landis' Animal House and The Blues Brothers, which came out a few years later ('78 & '80). It remains funny and entertaining even today.
Date Watched: 2/9/16 (w/ Emily in 3D)
I watched this masterpiece with my wife who isn't a huge action movie fan, but between my overwhelming love for it and all the critical recognition it has received, she agreed to give it a whirl. She liked it (and paid attention throughout), though not nearly as much as me. No surprise there. The 3D looked good on my TV, but I still prefer the 2D version because of all the stunning colors and visuals. The action is still impressive and the score is just orgasmic. I love this fucking film!
Date Watched: 2/10/16
Christmas horror movies are always worth a look because they take a traditionally happy holiday setting and inject scares, thrills and bloodshed - it's quite the contrast. Something about the colors is just hypnotizing, whether it's the bright lights or the music or the image of red blood on white snow, there's something eerily appealing about the combination.
Rare Exports is another worthy addition to the bloody Xmas pantheon, giving us a dark spin on Santa and his evil elves. In a interesting choice, it forgoes the cheap scares for slow building dread, much like The Thing which I deeply admire. There are at least three shot choices that perfectly imitate (ha) scenes from Carpenter's sci-fi classic. Impressive directorial debut from Jalmari Helander.
Date Watched: 2/10/16
My initial viewing of this left a bad taste in my mouth, I was obsessed with the original 2005 film when it came out, reading all of Miller's comics and buying the action figures. Nine years later, my obsession had subsided, but was piqued by the possibility of another bone-jarring, violent adventure in Sin City. Sadly, I was disappointed, but I decided to give it another go and enjoyed it much more the second time around. Without the wow factor of the first film, ADTKF just felt like a cheap rehash of the original, but it's actually a nice complement to the stories of Marv, Dwight, Manute, Senator Roark and Nancy Callahan. The new cast is solid, if unspectacular. I was expecting more from Ray Liotta, but was impressed by Joseph Gordon-Levitt's lucky Johnny gambler. Also, too much color this time around. Keep it mostly black & white...it's gorgeous like Ava Lord/Eva Green incredible body.
Date Watched: 2/11/16
It subverts clichés, the characters are hilarious, vulgar, quotable and most importantly interesting. Willem Dafoe is so funny. Fantastic use of music and slow-mo in the action scenes. Brings out that Dirty Harry/Death Wish vibe with satisfying vigilante justice.
Date Watched: 2/11/16
Not quite the clusterfuck I remember, but still weak because of a shitty script, casting a wooden Lara Flynn Boyle as the ridiculous villain, a bunch of unfunny jokes and horrible CGI.
Date Watched: 2/12/16
A rip roaring adventure. Brendan Fraser plays a badass surprisingly well, Rachel Weisz is sweet and sexy, the action and pacing is exciting and the music is superb. It's sequel, The Mummy Returns, is even more epically insane but isn't as charming or well-paced as this one.
Date Watched: 2/12/16
One of my favorite late 90's thrillers. It's an intriguing mystery with the good cast, even Angelina Jolie, and a cool serial killer. Overuse of Dutch angles and Hollywood computing.
Date Watched: 2/13/16
Such a nifty concept, a bank heist taking place during the massive flooding of a town, this 90s actioner is a fucking blast. The cast is game, the effects and set pieces are very cool and pulled off with practically with stunts and sets for the most part. The showstopper is the jet ski chase/fight in the school. It has a western feel to it complete with appropriate score.
Date Watched: 2/14/16 (w/ Emily)
Hilarious and kind of insightful in that stoner way. A jolly Christmas vibe and colorful (and occasionally trippy) visuals. Lots of inside jokes from the 90's. The stuff with Anthony Mackie's "social media game" were annoying and full of unwanted product placement.
Date Watched: 2/15/16 (w/ Emily)
I've always admired Brian De Palma's versatility. Like all great 70's & 80's directors, he got his start in the horror genre, parlaying that into a successful career. He has tackled action, sci-fi, war, comedy, crime and above all, thrillers in the vein of his idol, Alfred Hitchcock. In recent years, he's faded away, but I believe he has one great film left in him; hopefully we'll get to see it. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
The Fury is a odd mix of espionage and supernatural horror which makes it unique, however the pacing and runtime are problems. The film is just about two hours long, but because of the erratic pacing, it feels much longer. Trimming it down by 10 or 15 minutes would have benefited it greatly. Still, it's definitely worth a watch because of the performances, ending and score. John Cassavetes makes for a calculating villain while Kirk Douglas classes up the joint. John Williams' score is both nimble and brooding, enhanceing the film immensely. As far as telekinesis movies go, it's inferior to Cronenberg's Scanners which was released three years later.
Date Watched: 2/16/16
Exactly what I wanted. Deadpool is unlike almost every other comic character, in that he's an immature asshole who constantly wisecracks and breaks the fourth wall. This adaptation is faithful to the character I grew up loving delivering a vulgar, violent, offensive and fucking hilarious action-comedy.
Ryan Reynolds looks, sounds, acts and fights exactly how Deadpool should. The suit looks perfect and he has all the cool weapons and gadgets I remember - especially the swords! The fourth wall breaking is utilized fantastically, making fun of the studio or X-Men franchise but not overdoing it, while also serving as an expository device. I've always enjoyed character's addressing the camera, whether it be Ferris Bueller, Tyler Durden or Ray Liotta. The rest of the cast is solid. Morena Baccarin is sexy and sassy, and her chemistry with Reynolds is palpable. Newcomer Ed Skrein is formidable as the main villain Ajax (made better by the dry British accent) while Gina Carano plays his ass-kicking second-in-command (I'm beginning to see a trend here Gina...). TJ Miller was underused but still funny enough.
Lastly, we have Colossus who is CGI but easily one of the best things about the film. A metallic Russian behemoth who is polite and honorable, he is also portrayed exactly as I've always wanted to see him, CGI and all. It would be hard to portray his size without it. Understand that growing up, my two favorite X-Men (and comic characters in general) were Deadpool because of his massive arsenal and Colossus because he was a giant metal badass. To have them both be featured in the same movie and it be rated R makes it feel as though the film was tailor-made for me!
Lastly, I'm shocked yet elated the film grossed $150 million. It goes to show you that an R-rated film can still pull in major cash, meaning our chances of seeing more movies like this, that is mid-budget action or sci-fi films with a hard R-rating, has gone through the roof. Now would be the time for Blade IV or Dredd 2!
Date Watched: 2/17/16
Poorly assembled and narratively trite. The only bright spot is the planet-jumping portal fight in the finale. Visually stagnant as well...Alan Taylor hates colors I guess, giving the film a dirty look which makes sense thematically, but this kind of comic book movie needs more color.
Date Watched: 2/17/16
Still the best of the bunch, it delivers the action, thrills and cheeky meta-laughs. JCVD is a crazy villain while Simon West's direction captures that elusive 90's action film vibe. A guilty pleasure for sure.
Date Watched: 2/17/16
Back in the day, this would've been directed by John Carpenter and have been incredible, but now we get the elder versions of the archetypes Schwarzenegger and Stallone made famous. It could still be cool, but the plot is so boilerplate it's laughable. Sadly Sam Neill and Vincent D'Onofrio are wasted as well. Visually things are a sterile blue-brown-grey mess with no cinematographic value, while the action is tepid at best. Skip this one unless you are desperate.
Date Watched: 2/18/16
Interesting anthology type horror film, that places the characters in this sort of purgatory where they are tested to see if they truly belong there.
Date Watched: 2/18/16
Damn what a draining experience. Unrelentingly bleak and cryptic, it is old school horror with brilliant avant-garde touches. Slow burning, it requires patience from the viewer, especially with the dialogue and will be challenging to watch for some people.
Date Watched: 2/20/16
Despite an initial misstep with Alien 3, David Fincher crashed onto the scene with this twisted, gritty crime thriller follows two detectives as they search for a serial killer whose victims represent the seven deadly sins. This was one of those movies I watched right when I was getting into movies in high school and college so it had a big impact on me. The fucked up nature of the crimes and their realistic portrayal was shocking at the time and always stuck with me, each one more lurid than the last.
The cast is outstanding, beginning Fincher's frequent collaboration with Brad Pitt (I see he and Fincher having a DeNiro/DiCaprio – Scorsese relationship). Morgan Freeman plays his grizzled detective exceptionally well, I can't think of anyone better, while Spacey is deviously sinister as John Doe. Gwyneth Paltrow plays a small but pivotal role as Pitt's wife. The rest of the cast is faceless or forgettable (except for one of the lust victims) by design, intensifying the isolation and hopelessness the characters are experiencing.
Rating: 9.5/10
#67 - Starry Eyes [2014]
Talk about a disturbing film. Like House of the Devil, it feels like a horror film pulled straight from the 1970s, complete with gooseflesh inducing score and radical devil worshiping undertones. Think Rosemary's Baby and The Wicker Man – None of that fucking woman punching, bee-hating Nicolas Cage nonsense. Alexandra Essoe gives an incredibly dedicated, star-making performance. Her transformation is slow but extremely convincing.
Rating: 8/10
#68 - The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of The Unicorn [2011]
Spielberg finally made up for the queef fart that was Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Tintin is a riproaring adventure in the vein of Indiana Jones, with our heroes pursuing a lost relic and treasure as they try to elude crazy villains. The final action scene is a technical marvel, taking place as one unbroken take as Tintin & Co. are chased throughout a city as it crumbles around them, all in 3D. After viewing this, I decided to purchase a 3D TV.
Rating: 8.5/10
#69 - San Andreas [2015]
Really good effects, it mimics many classic disaster movies. The initial earthquake and subsequent tsunami speedboat breach are both showstoppers that managed to impress in the age of CGI overload. The Rock is earnest and Alexandra Daddario has the most amazing titties have ever seen. Having Carla Gugino be her mom is the perfect mother daughter combo.
Rating: 7/10
#70 - Black Mass [2015]
Depp is fantastic as James "Whitey" Bulger, quite a transformation. His dead, shark-like eyes give him an ominous, calculating glare. The rest of the ensemble cast is excellent, specifically Edgerton as John Connolly (love the accent). It keeps the characters grounded and the life of Whitey front and center,
It tries a bit too hard to emulate Goodfellas at times, but to be honest that's not necessarily a bad thing. Goodfellas is arguably the best mob movie ever (The Godfather I & II and The Untouchables are in the conversation) so at least the filmmakers are striving for gold, evidenced by superb musical selections that would make Scorsese proud. Bluntly violent, but shows the ruthlessness and paranoia these criminals are capable of. It's frightening to have someone you trust calmly lie to your face and then coldly shoot you in the back.
Rating: 8.5/10
#71 - Goosebumps [2015]
I'm a huge fan of the Goosebumps book series, renting them from the library as a boy and collecting the ones I really liked. Then I was given the entire original series in mint condition by a friend so now I've got them all. For a kid who was scared of pretty much everything, these novels were the perfect gateway into the horror realm.
Anyway, the movie does the books proud as a campy, self-aware family adventure that brings together all of R.L. Stine's monsters and creations by having them be released from within the books themselves. It's all very meta which may turn off those hoping for a more traditional adaptation, but I found it to be refreshing.
All the memorable monsters are represented, but unfortunately they take a backseat to Stine's more recent creations. I was hoping for more classic monsters from the original run. Having them be led by Slappy the dummy was reminiscent of the 90's TV series, as he was in at least three separate stories. Loved the T-1000 esque killer lawn gnomes and their Army of Darkness style goofiness. It's a good balance of horror and comedy, exactly like the source material.
Rating: 7/10
#72 - Taxi Driver [1976]
Senator Showing
Finally got to see this on the big screen. Strangely this came on a different channel immediately following Cape Fear back on 1/28/16 and just reminds me of how synergistic and collaborative Scorsese and De Niro's pairing was. Together, they produced some of the finest American Cinema. Moving on...
Taxi Driver offers a glimpse into the slowly eroding mind of a man being infected by his decaying surroundings. It paints the world as seedy and depraved, a true portrait of crime. This descent into madness is surreal and simultaneously dreamlike and nightmarish, a potent combination. De Niro is scary good and his "You talkin' to me?" speech is intense and deservedly iconic. Scorsese pushed the boundaries here, giving us a film that makes us uncomfortable but keeps us completely mesmerized.
Rating: 10/10
#73 - The Iron Giant [1999]
An amazing animated feature from Brad Bird in his directorial debut. It deals with its subject matter maturely and delicately, never feeling preachy (unlike his 2015 film Tomorrowland) while the animation is absolutely gorgeous. A must-watch.
Rating: 10/10
#74 - Spaceballs [1987]
Mel Brooks' send-up of the Star Wars trilogy remains funny throughout, acting as the perfect example of how to do a spoof properly.
Rating: 9/10
#75 - X-Men: First Class [2011]
I've watched all the X-Men films recently (except The Last Stand and Origins: Wolverine which are mediocre and cinematic diarrhea, respectively) and while I used to maintain X2 was the best, I believe First Class is now superior. It's more fun, the actors are better and the action setpieces are much more creative and thrilling than anything in Singer's films. Fassbender is utterly badass as Magneto, playing him with a cunning, slightly sadistic enjoyment echoing 007. It treats the characters with respect and allows each of them to shine with their unique powers.
Rating: 9/10
#76 - Role Models [2008]
Raunchy, profane and surprisingly sentimental, Role Models message of being yourself, letting your freak flag fly, is admirable. The laughs are plentiful from Rudd and Scott's brotherly chemistry to the supporting cast including Jane Lynch, Ken Jeong and Joe Lo Truglio. I personally loved all the Kiss music and jokes, especially the Destroyer-esque ending.
Rating: 7.5/10
#77 - Your Highness [2011]
Hilarious stoner comedy that always gets unjustly shit upon. Being a big fan of fantasy films like The Beastmaster, Labyrinth, Return To Oz and The Lord of the Rings trilogy, I find Your Highness to be a delightfully tongue-in-cheek spoof that is a fun fantasy adventure on top of being a comedy. Seriously, give this one a shot.
Rating: 7/10
#78 - Big Game [2014]
First Rare Exports and now Big Game, Finnish writer-director Jalmari Helander has impressed from the get-go, and is someone to keep an eye on in the future. Big Game is an instant action classic, joining the ranks of the very films it is homaging, which is the highest honor. Onni Tommila is earnest as a young hunter trying to prove himself by rescuing the President of the United States, played intelligently by Sam Jackson. The action is exciting and creative, and visually things have a First Blood/Predator look with the lush mountain forests of Finland. The less said about this film the better. If you like 80's action movies, check this out!
Rating: 8.5/10
#79 - Slap Shot [1977]
Hockey movies aren't exactly a hot commodity in the U.S., sorry my Canadian brethren, but if you're going to watch just one (and you're not 10 years old), make it Slap Shot, one of Paul Newman's finest performances. The comedy reminds me a lot of John Landis' Animal House and The Blues Brothers, which came out a few years later ('78 & '80). It remains funny and entertaining even today.
Rating: 8.5/10
#80 - Mad Max: Fury Road [2015]
I watched this masterpiece with my wife who isn't a huge action movie fan, but between my overwhelming love for it and all the critical recognition it has received, she agreed to give it a whirl. She liked it (and paid attention throughout), though not nearly as much as me. No surprise there. The 3D looked good on my TV, but I still prefer the 2D version because of all the stunning colors and visuals. The action is still impressive and the score is just orgasmic. I love this fucking film!
Rating: 10/10
#81 - Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale [2010]
Christmas horror movies are always worth a look because they take a traditionally happy holiday setting and inject scares, thrills and bloodshed - it's quite the contrast. Something about the colors is just hypnotizing, whether it's the bright lights or the music or the image of red blood on white snow, there's something eerily appealing about the combination.
Rare Exports is another worthy addition to the bloody Xmas pantheon, giving us a dark spin on Santa and his evil elves. In a interesting choice, it forgoes the cheap scares for slow building dread, much like The Thing which I deeply admire. There are at least three shot choices that perfectly imitate (ha) scenes from Carpenter's sci-fi classic. Impressive directorial debut from Jalmari Helander.
Rating: 8.5/10
#82 - Sin City: A Dame To Kill For [2014]
My initial viewing of this left a bad taste in my mouth, I was obsessed with the original 2005 film when it came out, reading all of Miller's comics and buying the action figures. Nine years later, my obsession had subsided, but was piqued by the possibility of another bone-jarring, violent adventure in Sin City. Sadly, I was disappointed, but I decided to give it another go and enjoyed it much more the second time around. Without the wow factor of the first film, ADTKF just felt like a cheap rehash of the original, but it's actually a nice complement to the stories of Marv, Dwight, Manute, Senator Roark and Nancy Callahan. The new cast is solid, if unspectacular. I was expecting more from Ray Liotta, but was impressed by Joseph Gordon-Levitt's lucky Johnny gambler. Also, too much color this time around. Keep it mostly black & white...it's gorgeous like Ava Lord/Eva Green incredible body.
Rating: 7.5/10
#83 - The Boondock Saints [1999]
It subverts clichés, the characters are hilarious, vulgar, quotable and most importantly interesting. Willem Dafoe is so funny. Fantastic use of music and slow-mo in the action scenes. Brings out that Dirty Harry/Death Wish vibe with satisfying vigilante justice.
Rating: 9/10
#84 - Men In Black II [2002]
Not quite the clusterfuck I remember, but still weak because of a shitty script, casting a wooden Lara Flynn Boyle as the ridiculous villain, a bunch of unfunny jokes and horrible CGI.
Rating: 5/10
#85 - The Mummy [1999]
A rip roaring adventure. Brendan Fraser plays a badass surprisingly well, Rachel Weisz is sweet and sexy, the action and pacing is exciting and the music is superb. It's sequel, The Mummy Returns, is even more epically insane but isn't as charming or well-paced as this one.
Rating: 9/10
#86 - The Bone Collector [1999]
One of my favorite late 90's thrillers. It's an intriguing mystery with the good cast, even Angelina Jolie, and a cool serial killer. Overuse of Dutch angles and Hollywood computing.
Rating: 7.5/10
#87 - Hard Rain [1998]
Such a nifty concept, a bank heist taking place during the massive flooding of a town, this 90s actioner is a fucking blast. The cast is game, the effects and set pieces are very cool and pulled off with practically with stunts and sets for the most part. The showstopper is the jet ski chase/fight in the school. It has a western feel to it complete with appropriate score.
Rating: 8.5/10
#88 - The Night Before [2015]
Hilarious and kind of insightful in that stoner way. A jolly Christmas vibe and colorful (and occasionally trippy) visuals. Lots of inside jokes from the 90's. The stuff with Anthony Mackie's "social media game" were annoying and full of unwanted product placement.
Rating: 7/10
#89 - The Fury [1978]
I've always admired Brian De Palma's versatility. Like all great 70's & 80's directors, he got his start in the horror genre, parlaying that into a successful career. He has tackled action, sci-fi, war, comedy, crime and above all, thrillers in the vein of his idol, Alfred Hitchcock. In recent years, he's faded away, but I believe he has one great film left in him; hopefully we'll get to see it. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
The Fury is a odd mix of espionage and supernatural horror which makes it unique, however the pacing and runtime are problems. The film is just about two hours long, but because of the erratic pacing, it feels much longer. Trimming it down by 10 or 15 minutes would have benefited it greatly. Still, it's definitely worth a watch because of the performances, ending and score. John Cassavetes makes for a calculating villain while Kirk Douglas classes up the joint. John Williams' score is both nimble and brooding, enhanceing the film immensely. As far as telekinesis movies go, it's inferior to Cronenberg's Scanners which was released three years later.
Rating: 7/10
#90 - Deadpool [2016]
Exactly what I wanted. Deadpool is unlike almost every other comic character, in that he's an immature asshole who constantly wisecracks and breaks the fourth wall. This adaptation is faithful to the character I grew up loving delivering a vulgar, violent, offensive and fucking hilarious action-comedy.
Ryan Reynolds looks, sounds, acts and fights exactly how Deadpool should. The suit looks perfect and he has all the cool weapons and gadgets I remember - especially the swords! The fourth wall breaking is utilized fantastically, making fun of the studio or X-Men franchise but not overdoing it, while also serving as an expository device. I've always enjoyed character's addressing the camera, whether it be Ferris Bueller, Tyler Durden or Ray Liotta. The rest of the cast is solid. Morena Baccarin is sexy and sassy, and her chemistry with Reynolds is palpable. Newcomer Ed Skrein is formidable as the main villain Ajax (made better by the dry British accent) while Gina Carano plays his ass-kicking second-in-command (I'm beginning to see a trend here Gina...). TJ Miller was underused but still funny enough.
Lastly, we have Colossus who is CGI but easily one of the best things about the film. A metallic Russian behemoth who is polite and honorable, he is also portrayed exactly as I've always wanted to see him, CGI and all. It would be hard to portray his size without it. Understand that growing up, my two favorite X-Men (and comic characters in general) were Deadpool because of his massive arsenal and Colossus because he was a giant metal badass. To have them both be featured in the same movie and it be rated R makes it feel as though the film was tailor-made for me!
Lastly, I'm shocked yet elated the film grossed $150 million. It goes to show you that an R-rated film can still pull in major cash, meaning our chances of seeing more movies like this, that is mid-budget action or sci-fi films with a hard R-rating, has gone through the roof. Now would be the time for Blade IV or Dredd 2!
Rating: 8.5/10
#91 - Thor: The Dark World [2014]
Poorly assembled and narratively trite. The only bright spot is the planet-jumping portal fight in the finale. Visually stagnant as well...Alan Taylor hates colors I guess, giving the film a dirty look which makes sense thematically, but this kind of comic book movie needs more color.
Rating: 5/10
#92 - The Expendables 2 [2012]
Still the best of the bunch, it delivers the action, thrills and cheeky meta-laughs. JCVD is a crazy villain while Simon West's direction captures that elusive 90's action film vibe. A guilty pleasure for sure.
Rating: 7.5/10
#93 - Escape Plan [2013]
Back in the day, this would've been directed by John Carpenter and have been incredible, but now we get the elder versions of the archetypes Schwarzenegger and Stallone made famous. It could still be cool, but the plot is so boilerplate it's laughable. Sadly Sam Neill and Vincent D'Onofrio are wasted as well. Visually things are a sterile blue-brown-grey mess with no cinematographic value, while the action is tepid at best. Skip this one unless you are desperate.
Rating: 3/10
#94 - Southbound [2016]
Interesting anthology type horror film, that places the characters in this sort of purgatory where they are tested to see if they truly belong there.
Rating: 7/10
#95 - The Witch [2016]
Damn what a draining experience. Unrelentingly bleak and cryptic, it is old school horror with brilliant avant-garde touches. Slow burning, it requires patience from the viewer, especially with the dialogue and will be challenging to watch for some people.
Rating: 8/10
#96 - Se7en [1995]
Despite an initial misstep with Alien 3, David Fincher crashed onto the scene with this twisted, gritty crime thriller follows two detectives as they search for a serial killer whose victims represent the seven deadly sins. This was one of those movies I watched right when I was getting into movies in high school and college so it had a big impact on me. The fucked up nature of the crimes and their realistic portrayal was shocking at the time and always stuck with me, each one more lurid than the last.
The cast is outstanding, beginning Fincher's frequent collaboration with Brad Pitt (I see he and Fincher having a DeNiro/DiCaprio – Scorsese relationship). Morgan Freeman plays his grizzled detective exceptionally well, I can't think of anyone better, while Spacey is deviously sinister as John Doe. Gwyneth Paltrow plays a small but pivotal role as Pitt's wife. The rest of the cast is faceless or forgettable (except for one of the lust victims) by design, intensifying the isolation and hopelessness the characters are experiencing.
Rating: 9.5/10
#97 - Ice Age: Continental Drift [2012]
Date Watched: 2/21/16
I like these movies, but they are becoming narratively cliche and overpopulated with characters. Seriously, I glanced in the cast list and everybody is in this movie. Who the fuck gave Nicki Minaj-a-twat a speaking role? She sounds like a skipping Salt-n-Peppa record. It's a veritable melting pot of bad pop stars, B-list actors and vets here for the paycheck (looking at you Denis Leary). Anyway, for a kids movie you could do a lot worse. The visuals are cool and it promotes scientific concepts like the eponymous continental drift, though it has no regard for physics. Win some, lose some.
Rating: 5.5/10
#98 - Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted [2012]
Date Watched: 2/21/16
Ice Age and this faced off at the summer box office. While they are very similar (just look at the posters), the animation and direction are more impressive and memorable. Loved the French animal control agent whose relentless pursuit and robotic nature makes her a surefire nod to the T-1000.
Rating: 7/10
#99 - White House Down [2012]
Date Watched: 2/21/16
This and Olympus Has Fallen came out the same year, only a few months apart. Channing Tatum and Jamie Foxx (two huge stars) vs. Gerard Butler and Aaron Eckhart (huge in 2007/2008, but now not so much) should make it easy to predict the box office/critical winner, right? Wrong. As is the case with these kinds of plot coincidences, the first film released usually does better unless the quality difference is significant. Both films are essentially Die Hard in the White House, but OHF made more money because it is the better, more entertaining film (I believe because of its smaller budget and R rating).
Roland Emmerich is a master of action and planetary destruction, but when the mayhem gets scaled down, he loses a bit of his touch. It has his trademark sentimental idealism, which no longer works like it did in the 90's. Visually, things are very muted and boring, which makes the goings-on underwhelming. I don't think Tatum and Foxx have very good buddy-cop charisma; you need only watch 21 Jump Street to see what I mean. It all feels rather forced.
Rating: 5.5/10
#100 - Freaks of Nature [2015]
Date Watched: 2/21/16
Good, but not great. Scouts Guide was better. Main problem is the lack of explanation of the universe. Humans, zombies and vampires coexist with no clear explanation why. Normally, it wouldn't be an issue but the entire plot hinges on their interaction and eventual cooperation so it feels undeveloped and incomplete. Loved the design of the aliens, the weird asides, the drab zingers and the visuals. Wanted more practical gore and titties. Main guy is too awkward to be likable.
No comments:
Post a Comment